To a new year.

So, in my last blog post, I updated you about my job. I ended it with saying, “That's the only update I have right now, I'll post when something new happens.” Well something happened almost exactly a month before that post. I’ve been trying to think of how to put it in a post. It's not been an easy post to write, but here goes, the weekend of 'Hey' Adam and I broke up.

Adam and I spent the day together like we usually do. We went to lunch with his family then we went to a store with his brother and sister-in-law. After that we then went to his house and hung out. The day went on and he asked if I wanted to go for a drive. On the drive, he asked if I had a specific destination I wanted it to end at, I said no. Usually we end up at the park and just talk about the day or whatever comes to mind. Then he called me by my name, which might not sound weird, but when we were alone he didn’t really call me by my name. Following that was, “At the moment I don’t think this relationship is working, and I think we should see other people.” All I could say was, okay. I didn’t know what else to say. He asked if I was okay and I just started crying. We parked and cried and talked for a while. He then took me back to his house so I could get my stuff and go home with my dad. When we got home, Adam told me that after he broke up with me that he was waiting for me to hit him, and tell him I hated him. Which didn’t even cross my mind as something to do. I don’t hate him, I didn’t hate him then and I don’t hate him now, nor do I think I ever will. I hate that we broke up after three years, but I don’t hate him.

And so, for the first time in three years, I’m single. For the first time in three years, I don’t have to think or check with another person when making plans. For the first time in three years, I can see other people. For the first time in three years, I must get used to being my own person.